Yes, I have been doing stuff

I'm sure you've all been wondering, "What the heck has she been doing lately? Why no pictures? Why no craftiness?"


Well, for one thing, I've been taking care of these guys:




I got a little swept away by all of the dishcloth craziness that has been going around, a la Mason Dixon, and tried to make this one that is supposed to be a bulldog. Do you see it? I sort of, kind of, maybe can see a bulldog, but who cares, it's a dishcloth.


I've also been playing around with my Put Together Book from Wee Wonderfuls. I made a kitty from scraps that I had in my stash, and my daughter has been sleeping with it every night. I had to sneak in there and steal it out of her bed just to take a picture of it. Such a great pattern, and so cute! She did have little shoes, but I didn't get around to tacking them on, so they have been lost already.


Being in between sizes and trying to lose this baby weight has been so stinky. I don't really have a lot of clothes that fit right now, but I don't want to spend money on any when they aren't going to fit in a few months. Now that I have my handy dandy dress form, I thought that it would be a good idea to try and make some things. After a full day of neglecting the housework and sitting hunched over a sewing machine, I have this!


(Picture taken by my six year old)

I love it so much, I even wore it grocery shopping the other day. Why not? It's a little too revealing to wear to church, and I don't go out that much, so I packed up the baby and went shopping in my dress and heels. I felt like a house wife from the forties. It was actually a lot of fun! I've come to the conclusion that just because I am home all day doesn't mean that I can't dress up and look feminine. I know that the sweats and pajama bottoms are comfortable, but they kind of depress me when I walk by a mirror. I KNOW that I will definitely have pajama bottom days, but I do want to make an effort to make myself look nicer and feel more put together.

The Chuck's Cabled Socks are progressing, I am trying to have them done for the State Fair in August. Yee Haw!

Knitter

Last week, I taught my 6 yo son how to knit.

Tonight, I asked him to do a chore, and he uttered the phrase, "As soon as I finish this row."

*wiping the tear from my eye*

He's become a knitter.

Out of Control Excitement

Saturday, around 11 pm. The plumber and I are sitting on the couch, I am knitting, he is reading a beer brewing magazine. All of a sudden, I sit up.

Me: "You know what I would love to do tomorrow? Let's go to church, pick up some bagels, and take a nap!"

The Plumber: "That would be awesome! And if we have time, we can clean up the house for an hour or so too!"


You WISH you had my rock and roll lifestyle.

I Feel Like A Super Hero

Do you think that maybe one time I could fix my hair before taking pictures? Good grief.




I made a dress form out of duct tape tonight. I have been wanting one for a while, but they are pretty expensive, and from what I hear aren't very accurate to real body shapes. Having a double of my body to try clothing on as I'm sewing it seems like it will be very helpful, and easier to get an accurate fit. I searched online, and found several articles about making dress forms with different materials, and was going to try the paper tape method, but couldn't find the right kind of tape. So duct tape seemed the easiest and most cost effective option. Here is how I made mine, using bits and pieces from other resources, plus my own ideas thrown into the mix.
First, go pee. It might take a while and once you're wrapped in duct tape you can't bend very well. Also, this is definitely a two person project. My favorite plumber did mine, he got out of his bad mood and agreed to help me with my duct tape madness.

Wear a long t-shirt that goes past the hump in your bum. If you don't want to shriek like a banshee when you take the dress form off, wrap a piece of saran wrap around your neck.
Using the duct tape, wrap a strip underneath your breasts, then a piece over them. Then make an x, going from each shoulder to underneath the opposite breast. Use small pieces of tape to fill in the spaces and keep wrinkles in the tape to a minimum. Make a nice shape with the tape around the armholes and the neck; this will make it easier to tape them up after stuffing.
Place pieces of tape from side to side on your front. Don't try to wrap all the way around your body, it is a lot harder to keep the wrinkles under control. Smaller pieces are best. After completing the front, turn around and do the back, making sure to keep the tape snug so it is as accurate to your body shape as possible.
Grab an appropriate weapon and pretend you're a superhero. When else are you going to be wearing a shiny skin tight suit straight out of a comic book? Take advantage!




Of course that's a whisk I'm holding! What else would The Magnificent Momma use to fight her battles?

using a marker, make horizontal marks across the back. Then cut up the back and take the dress form off. Go pee, cause you know you have to.
Using your marks, tape up the back. Then tape up the neck. This is kind of tricky, as you don't want to distort the shape of the form. It is helpful to have someone else hold it up and 3 dimensional.
To support the dress form, I nailed a wooden disk (2.00) to a flag pole (5.00) I found both at Wal mart.



Wrap a big fluff of stuffing around the disk, and shove it into the form. Holding the pole straight up, with the dress form upside down, start stuffing. Make sure that the breast holes are tightly stuffed, and that you stuff evenly around the pole so it stays in the center. I read that it would be a good idea to use styrofoam in the breast area, and I tried it, but it didn't look right. Stuffing them tightly with just stuffing worked fine for me. I ended up using 3 bags of stuffing, and could have used maybe a 1/4 bag more. I used the stuffing bags themselves to fill the last few spaces.
Now you want to tape up the bottom, again being careful not to distort the shape of the form. I left a small space open and stuffed again before taping the whole thing up.
Fold the sleeves of the tshirt inside, and tape up the armholes.
The base was the hardest thing for me to figure out how to make, some people use Christmas tree stands. I was going to go that route until I found this. It is the bottom of a chair that broke. Perfect!
You could also build some type of support if you're handy like that.


I bought some 2 dollar a yard knit fabric at Walmart, and sewed the side and top to make a tube. After placing it on the dress form inside out, pin and sew to get a tight fit over the form. I threaded some ribbon through a large needle and just stitched it around the bottom and pulled it tight like a drawstring.


You actually can't see the tape through the fabric, but the flash kind of exposes it. I also added a rose applique to kind of pretty it up, since its going to be living in my living room. (The plumber REALLY like that idea. He wants to keep it in the crawl space. What good is it going to do me there? He just doesn't get it) I need to find something to cover the duct tape by the base, but it's almost 2 am so I'll worry about that tomorrow. I am hoping that I will have to make another one soon after I lose all of my baby weight (only 15 more lbs!) , but for now it will work great.

Fabric Cutters Should be Timed

Another piece of my duct tape mystery project. It's the bottom of a chair that broke.


Remember those altoid tins I was talking about? I finally got around to making one. I don't really know why I decided to make a chick in a bikini, it just felt right. I went to JoAnns to buy some felt for this project and picked out about 18 bolts of different colors. I brought them up to the counter and got the SLOWWWWEEEESSSSTTTT fabric cutter in North America. She had to have been 80 years old. Of course, I had all 4 children with me. She would picccckkkk up the boooolt, looook at it, layyyyy it ouuuuttt, and cuu, no wait, straighten the fabric, uuuuutttt dooowwnn the liiinne. Piiiiiccckkk up the faaabric, foooollllddd it up, lay it to the side. Fiiiinnnd the scaaannner, scannnn the baarcooode, staaarree at the scanner, and then move to the next piece. I only wanted 1/8 a yard of each color! 45 minutes later (!!!!) she was finally finished. My kids were astonishingly well behaved, I don't know how they were so patient. Heck, I wanted to throw a tantrum from boredom, how they kept calm at their ages, I don't know. Miracles DO still happen!


If you haven't been to Eunny Jang's blog, you are really missing out. The patterns that she puts out are incredible. Here is my first sock that I am working on from her pattern "Chuck's Cable Socks". It is probably the most complex knitting project that I have ever done, but I love them! The multicolored yarn is Lornas Laces and the white is Regia. I am pretty impressed with myself. I'll be even more impressed if I actually make the second one.

What can you do with duct tape?

So I have a little project planned for tonight. The ingredients include duct tape, a flag pole, and three bags of stuffing. Any guesses?

Scratch that... The plumber is not being very nice and is refusing to help me. Dang it! Who says men don't get PMS?

Soooo, maybe in a few days I can work my mojo (and maybe a bribe involving alcohol) and get him to help me. It's definitely a two person job.

As for a winner to the contest. PBnJ wins hands down with Lamentations of the Father. If you haven't read it yet, check out the comments from the previous post. That is the funniest thing I have read in a long time. PBnJ, email me your address and I will send your prize out ASAP.

I have lots of things I am working on craftwise, but the camera is out of batteries and there is not a battery in sight. So tomorrow I am off to the store to get some so that I can post some pics.

Now I'm off to go drown my duct tape sorrows in a glass of Diet Coke.

Wee bit of a contest

This site just passed the 5000 view mark, and I am so grateful and excited! I've only been doing this since February, and I have met so many new people, and been inspired by all of you and your creativeness. So I decided to have a little contest. I have been in a little bit of a funk lately, and need a good laugh. Two balls of sock yarn go to the person who leaves a comment with the best (clean) joke that makes me laugh the hardest. I will leave it open until Friday night. Good luck!

How to Break into Your Car With a Fishing Pole

Step 1: Drive to a cabin in the middle of nowhere. Make sure that there is no cell phone coverage, and even if you do find a phone, it will cost over a hundred dollars to get a locksmith out there, if he can even find it at all.

Step 2: Lock keys in van.

Step 3: Tell husband. Let him curse a little.

Step 4: Hunt around cabin for anything you could possibly use to break into the car. We tried an assortment of things such as: screwdriver, barbecue fork, fishing pole, piece of wood off of some blinds, a chisel, and a magnet.

Step 5: Try various configurations of items. Ding! BRIGHT IDEA!



Step 6: Find a fishing rod that you aren't going to cry over if it breaks. (Try your sister's pole. The EEKing sound she makes as you brutally shove her pole through the window is kind of entertaining) Fold a long piece of fishing line in half, then thread through the holes, leaving the loop at the end. Fold the holes down flat. (They may not fold up again without breaking, so don't use an expensive one, unless you're desperate!)




Step 7: Have your sister's fiance use a screwdriver to pry the window open a smidge. Then maybe think about putting some pants on your baby.



Step 8: Shove the fishing pole through the slit in the window, catch the lock in the loop, pull the fishing line taut, and PULL UP.




Step 9: Open door, retrieve keys, and congratulate yourself on your Macgyveresque skills.